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Back to Humor

Who Put Decor In Decoration?


by Knight Pierce Hirst

When it came to decorations, my grandmother told me not to wrap a disappointment. By that she meant not to make a gift look better than it actually was. Because I'm gift wrap challenged - paper held together by lots of tape and topped with a stick-on bow - that's not a problem.

Recently, however, I received a gift that was too pretty to open - so I didn't. The stack of five, gold and silver boxes tied with silver, mesh ribbon was sent by a gourmet cookie company as a thank you gift from an acquaintance. Because I needed a thank you gift the same day the cookies arrived. I'm still wondering if the person I gave them to opened them. If you receive a stack of five, gold and silver boxes tied with silver, mesh ribbon, you'll know.

I've seen cakes decorated with ribbons and flowers, cartoon characters and exact likenesses. It's edible art, but in my family the name on the cake was the most important thing. My older son thought that if it was your birthday, your piece of cake should include every letter in your name. He said it was for luck - and I suppose it was. After all, it's luck that his name has more letters than his brother's.

Party stores have decorations for every occasion. They have a different aisle for every holiday. Okay, there's no aisle for In-law's Day. For In-law's Day you have to combine the Halloween and Thanksgiving aisles.

Then there's Christmas decorations. There should be a law against putting them up until after Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, passing a law takes a long time. Since stores decorate before Halloween, maybe it would be easier to change the three wise men's gifts. Instead of gold, frankincense and myrrh, the gifts could be candy corn, camel apples and popcorn - all individually wrapped, of course.

Maybe decorating is a woman thing. Maybe it's part of our nesting instinct. We think a bouquet of flowers or new throw pillows can change a room. Men think changing the channel on the big screen TV does the same thing.

Maybe decorating is a woman thing because we decorate our bodies with makeup, hair styles and coordinated outfits. Men are different. They act like it would kill them to wear a suit and tie. Hmmm, considering where you usually see men wearing suits and ties, maybe it does kill them.

About the Author
Knight Pierce Hirst takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com
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