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Back to Humor

Who Put The Toil In Toilets?


by Knight Pierce Hirst

Every woman has waited in line to use a toilet and every man has waited for a woman who is waiting in line. Because the designers of a new arena at St. Louis University knew that, they installed more ceramic commodes for women, unintentionally breaking the law. Missouri is one of the states that requires an equal number of porcelain facilities for both men and women. Nevertheless, because it takes women longer to use these facilities, there are times women can't take equality sitting down.

New York City's Mayor Bloomberg understands that and recently signed the Women's Restroom Equity Act. The goal of this act if to bring public restroom parity to sports arenas, bars, movie theaters and other entertainment venues. This act mandates that those places have two women's bathroom stalls for every one that is allotted to men. Now this is a double standard women can stand behind - well, stand in front of.

The Travel Center at mile marker #77 on Interstate 75 in rural Kentucky has literally become a place to go. The building's limestone and cherry wood interior houses art galleries, shops, a cafe and a grill, as well as immaculately clean and ultra modern restrooms. There are even pots of fresh flowers by the sinks. Who would have thought a rest stop would be a place people would want to stop and smell the roses.

Who would have thought automatic-flushing toilets would pose a problem for potty training. Because children are too short to block the sensor, the porcelain potties scare children by flushing while the children are sitting on them. According to the author of "The Potty Training Answer Book", parents should help their children face their fear of the whooshing, white monster. Jeffrey Kay, however, the father of a potty princess, decided to slay the monster. He invented the "Flush Stopper", which adheres to the back of a toilet and blocks the sensor's beam. Leave it to a dad to have a stand-up solution for the problem.

One solution for the problem of water conservation was the mandating of low-flush toilets, which began in 1992. Today switching to water-efficient water closets can save the average family as much as $100 a year and the savings on a national level are estimated to be $11.3 million a day. Isn't it good to know that in a down economy toilets can help us stay flush?

About the Author
Knight Pierce Hirst takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com
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